5/19/2005

The "Fuck History" Option:
The Rude Pundit isn't sure 'cause, you know, he's no etymologist or Congressional historian, but it seems that overturning 200 years of history, tradition, and procedural precedent would be, well, shit, the exact opposite of "conservative." 'Cause, even if you buy the lie that Senate Democrats' filibusters of a Bush-nominated judge here and there is "unprecedented," the Democrats are still playing by the rules of the Senate.

In other words, let's say you play chess with the same person every day for 100 years without either of you castling. You never had any agreement you would never castle. You just never did it. Then one day, you decide to get out of a sticky situation by doing the whole rook-king do-si-do. Sure, your opponent may get upset, but fuck him. It's the rules. Tell him to shove his bishop up his ass and move on.

Just because you use the rules in a way your opponent dislikes doesn't mean you get to take a shit on the rules themselves. Unless, apparently, you are a Republican, where your washroom keeps toilet paper with the Constitution and the Rules of the Senate written on it so you can wipe your ass or your kooz on it or use it to jack off into, imagining Thomas Jefferson fucking a slave or two.

But, of course, the "unprecedented" line is a huge, stinking, skunk-sprayed dog of a lie, as Charles Schumer demonstrated yesterday when he confronted Bill Frist with Frist's own vote to prevent cloture on debate on a judge (also known as a "filibuster"). Frist, in one of those amazing "hominah-hominah" moments that the Republicans are getting good at whenever their pants are pulled down, tried to explain that, "No, really, the problem is partisan filibusters, otherwise filibusters are fine, but, oh, shit, you partisan fuckers, can someone bring me a cat and a scalpel 'cause I'm a-gittin' the jitters."

Josh Marshall nailed it yesterday when he said that Bill Frist's efforts "to assert that it is unconstitutional because each judge does not get an up or down vote by the entire senate you have to hold that the United States senate has been in more or less constant violation of the constitution for more than two centuries." History, though, doesn't matter. All that matters is unmitigated power, unchecked partisanship, and undiluted hate of the nation. In order to support a ruling that overturns the filibuster, you have to hate the history of America, you have to hate the minority, you have to be filled with nothing but disdain for the processes of government that have allowed us to exist as a republic.

The Democrats know that the Republican party is more vicious than anything Tricky Dick would have dared to allow himself to dream as he flogged himself nightly into ecstasy in the secret Oval Office cloak room. Still, it's disheartening to read that nearly every compromise that's been proposed involves the Democrats mostly caving in to the Republicans in order to maintain the appearance of cooperation. It's pathetic, like watching two parents who obviously hate each other stay together for the "sake" of the children when, really, all they're doing is fucking up the kids for good.

So the Rude Pundit says fuck 'em. Bring it, as Harry Reid, the smallest man with the biggest balls on the Hill, said. There will be hell to pay in 2006 between this, Schiavo, the war, Social Security, and more. Let the fuckers push the red button and see 'em get turned into shadows on the Capitol wall.